Stardate111711.1914

I haven't been keeping up on my blog for quite a while.  I just felt like it was the right time to publish another post.  There has been a lot of negative things going on lately, and I need to vent.  There has been problems with my children, with work, and with personal things.  I have been trying to cope with all of this, but sometimes it seems that I am drowning.  I feel like I am in the middle of an ocean of trouble, floating on a slowly deflating raft, and there is no one around to help.  My lifelines are few and they seem fragile, like a small puff of wind could break them as easily as a cobweb is broken by a duster.  However, I have found a lifeline that was always there, even if I denied it, and this one is as strong as steel and as comforting as a warm blanket.  I didn't see it until it was almost too late, but now, even though I still feel as though I am drowning, I have more hope for the outcome of this situation.  It really is an amazing feeling to learn that God really IS there.  After so long with no hope, after such a long time pretending to have faith and know God, it truly is a feeling of freedom, peace and love.  Amazing is the only way to describe it.

Stardate7112011.0043

Well, there hasn't been much going on lately.  Just the usual American dream stuff:  not making enough money for anything fun but having more than enough love to go around.  LOL.  Making the house payment by working way too much, and not being able to do much fun stuff.  I guess I have finally joined the rest of the adults.  I never thought that I would be so happy and so stressed out and miserable at the same time.  I hope there are others out there that feel or have felt the same way.  I have to have faith that God will open a door somewhere because all the windows have steel bars and laser alarms on them it seems like. 
Paying the bills:  too much money
Working:  too much time away from home
Having a wonderful husband:  priceless!

Stardate 6102011.0047

Life has been going pretty well so far.  The bills are getting paid, maybe not on time, but they are getting paid.  Work has been going well so far, and I have heard that others higher up on the totem pole are hearing good things about me too.  I really love my job, but sometimes I get frustrated because there isn't enough staff to go around right now.  Today I saw a new bunch of orientees, so hopefully we will be getting more help soon.  I hear that the orientees will be starting this weekend.  Hopefully everyone will work out and the work load will be a little more evenly distributed.  I know for a fact that one of the orientees is a friend of mine who was in the same class with me, so I hope I will get to work with her.  I am looking forward to it.  Well, time to go to bed so I can have another crazy day at work.  Love to all my family and friends.

Stardate5232011.2155

Well, it's been a few days.  I have had a rough week.  I worked 6 days in a row, and I got peed on and pooped on a few times.  Oh well.  I guess shit really does happen doesn't it.  I have heard the phrase "I got shit on" a few times, but I didn't expect it to be so literal.  Nature of the job I guess.  I have been having a good time at work though.  I really like it.  The house is hotter than Hades.  The previous owner has promised to get it fixed since it was a condition of the buyer agreement, but hasn't got it done yet.  I plan on calling him tomorrow.  We are also down to one vehicle because our car is broken and hasn't gotten fixed yet either.  Still trying to get caught up on everything we got behind on moneywise.  Welcome to the real world of life.  Living cheap isn't easy, but we are managing.  I car pool with a friend from work, and save our gas money for the days we don't work together.  We also limit our trips to Hutchinson to shop and we clip coupons and plan what we are shopping for to save time money and gas, especially since we are relying on Donny's truck.  All the same, I am loving life right now.  I am happy, even though I am stressed out all the time, and I am sleeping well and working my butt off.  I finally feel like a member of the real world.  I am planning on getting my RN degree, but I have enough to do right now.  I just got my CNA license, and passed my state exam with a 94%.  Pretty good even if I do say so myself.  I know that all my family and friends are proud of me, and to tell you the truth, I am proud of myself.  Anyone who knows me knows how I tend to start things and not finish them, so I am proud of starting and finishing this.  I have tried and failed in school at least twice, so knowing that I can do it makes me feel like I can do anything.  I have all the support I could hope for from my family and friends and from my wonderful husband.  God bless him and my family and friends

Stardate 5162011.2312

Well, I know why they associate the full moon with lunatics.  We had a lot of people who were acting a little more agitated tonight.  It made the night go fast and last forever at the same time.  I have lost two pounds since I started working there.  I walk an average of 8000 to 10000 steps each shift.  Here's hoping I will continue to lose that unnecessary weight.  My best friend Jamie had her baby today too...Ezekiel Gary.....9 lbs and 18 inches long....she is so happy to have the baby on the outside!  As big as that baby is, I would be happy too.

Stardate 5152011.1857

Well, today has been fairly decent.  I haven't done a whole lot, except for Donny and I got our storage shed a little more organized and found a few things we needed for the house.  I am in the process of making an afghan for a friend that I work with that has been giving me rides to and from work since all that crap with the car and Donny's truck having been broke down too.  She lives in Lyons so I am only about 1/2 a block off her regular route to work, so it works out well.  She won't take any gas money from me so I found out a couple of her favorite colors and am working on a blanket for her.  Hopefully she'll like it. 

Stardate 5142011.1727

I have had some problems over the last week.  My hubby took my car to help some "friends" with a paper route, and the key broke off in the ignition.  These "friends" told us that they would call the newspaper office (where the car broke down) and let them know that the car would be there for a few days, just over the weekend.  These people told us that the paper office was ok with that.  The "friends" told us that they would buy and replace the ignition switch and the door lock that they broke and that they would have it done the next day.  After almost two weeks, we get a call from the people we are buying the car from saying that they were taking the car back from us because it had been towed off from the paper office and placed in impound.  Apparently the car was towed at 8 AM, but we didn't know until about 5 or 6 PM.  The "friends" had lied to us about calling the paper office.  Anyway, it turns out that they had lied to us about everything. They told us they had ordered the part.  They told us the part had come in, then that it hadn't come in yet, and so on.  Turns out they hadn't ever ordered the stupid thing.  What a bunch of "friends" huh?  Good news is we may still be able to work something out on the car with the owners.  Hopefully we will have the car back soon, with the ignition and door fixed.  The other things that have made this week stressful are: Donny's truck breaking down the day after the car breaks down, and our dog got really sick for a few days.  Our dog Casper is getting better, slowly but surely.  So that stress is lifting too.  Oh well.  Can't make diamonds with out pressure and stress.